Cheapo DVD Reviews: Killersaurus (2015)

"When a scientist runs short of funding for his life-saving medical Bio-Printing research, he accepts an offer of investment from a shadowy military organisation. In return, he is forced to use his technology to create the ultimate battlefield weapon - a full size Tyrannosaurus Rex. After a horrific accident in which the dinosaur massacres his research team, the scientist shuts down the project. However, his investors demand results and it can only be a matter of time before the deadly T-Rex is unleashed upon the world."

This film was not what I was expecting.

I sure as hell wasn't expecting Killersaurus to be good.  
This is a low-budget dinosaur movie after all. However I thought I might get some cheesy, bad-CGI dinosaur munching action and a few laughs. What I got was...something else entirely.

 The first surprise was that this was not a low-budget dinosaur movie. Killersaurus is a very low budget British dinosaur movie.

So what does this mean in real terms? Let me quickly run through some bullet points.

1. A multi-million research lab is apparently controlled from the back room of a side-street workshop.

2. Said lab only has 6 staff, only three of home get to do any talking. Or anything at all.

3. The head scientist dresses like a dad on his day off and has a definite Midlands accent.

4. The high-tech security keeping the T.Rex safely contained consists of a rolling garage door that, quite frankly, would not stop an annoyed chav with decent boots.

5. Rather cleverly, the dinosaur is kept hidden as much as possible but even so, it is easy to recognise as a rubber puppet with somebody's arm up the back making the mouth go up and down.

I might have been willing to overlook all of these because like I said, I was expecting low-budget and silly anyway but while Killersaurus does have some decent ideas and a couple of the actors are at least trying, it suffers from one flaw which is fatal to a movie like this.

Too much talking. Not enough rampaging T. Rex.

Or to put it another way, KillerSaurus is dull.

  Way too much time is spent on characters chatting in dark rooms and by the time the action finally rolls around it's too late.  I am also convinced the film-makers had got fed up and wanted to go home because how else do you explain a dinosaur movie that ends with a T.Rex finally escaping after 80 odd minutes and our heroes pretty-much going " Welp. It's escaped. Nowt we can do. Let's sod off."

Build-up is good but you do need to have a decent payoff and KillerSaurus doesn't.

How much did I pay for this: 99p
Was it worth it:  This is not even enjoyable as a "Bad" film so that's a massive NOPE.  Avoid.

Big D builds a Mustang - Badly. Really Badly.

Disclaimer: I am not good at making models but I do it anyway. This will not be pretty. 

 Yep. This is another model making post. If you're expecting any kind of improvement  then you're on course for disappointment.  If anything I've got worse. 

  "I fancy a model" I thought to myself "Not a Spitfire though - I want something different and preferably with an unusual colour-scheme."  AA quick visit to Waterlooville Models and I came out with something that fit the bill. The colour-scheme was downright eye-catching. 

This is what the kit looked like when I unpacked it

 Right away I noticed something odd. 

Wasn't there supposed to be some Swiss markings for this thing?  

I ended up peering back in the box to see if I missed another sheet. 

Nope. 

Eventually it dawned on me that the box included some little white crosses and I would need to paint the rest myself. 

 "Bollocks to that" I said to myself and went for Plan B. 

The back of the box offered a pair of alternatives. 

The Nationalist Chinese was clearly the more striking of the two so a Kuomintang Mustang it would be.

Now I just had to build the bloody thing. 

After a bit of fiddling, excessive swearing and lots and lots of squinting at the instructions I managed to get the cockpit assembly put together.  These fingers are really not suited for tiny parts. 

Maybe I should build 1/48 instead? 

I then glued the hull together and deployed my high-tech clamping apparatus.

This is when I noticed something.

I don't think the big hole in the bottom of the fuselage should be there? 

Did I put a bit in upside down or something? 

Once I'd slapped a thumbs worth of filler in there and glued the wings on I had something a bit more plane-like.

For some reason I didn't take many photos after this. 

So here's a picture of a plant in my garden.

Anybody know what it is?

It's the lilac-y thing I'm interested in.

To try and some up the rest of the build it runs a bit like this:

P51B sits on kitchen table while I add bits to it every now and again. 

I add the canopy.

I take the canopy off because it doesn't fit properly and frantically file down the pilot's headrest 

because it was about 3mm higher than it should have been. 

I get the masking tape out and prepare to carefully mask the canopy so I could paint in the frame lines. 

I decide to freehand it instead because this is model already way beyond the point where it will impress anybody and I need my kitchen table back. 

I perform a paint job that could have been bettered by a 6 year old with ADD and a twitch. 

I add the decals - as usual throwing away any that are too small and fiddly because sod that for a game of soldiers. 

And here's the finished result. 

I think we can agree that it looks decent provided you're not too close.

Too close being defined as "Within 6 feet"  obviously.

The thing is, I might be terrible at making models and I know right now some of you are mocking my lack of skill, talent and working motor control but I did enjoy putting this together and I do feel a sense of  achievement in getting this made.  It's now sitting proudly on my shelf  alongside the wonky Gladiator and the Spit with the upside-down wings and my inner ten year old is quite pleased with himself. 

That's All Folks. .