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Monday 19 August 2013

Heavy Metal Cover Girls: Beautiful Creatures.

 What have we done so far.. demons, angels, goddesses...hmm. I think I can stretch the supernatural theme a bit further. So today I'm going to bring you a selection of delightful damsels from the outer limits. The things that go bump-an-grind in the night. Approach with caution.

Absinthium - One For the Road (Italy 2012)

album cover green fairy
He saw her once and spent the rest of his life hoping that the next glass would be the one that brought her to him again. 
What he didn't know was that at the end of every session, she would appear, looking down at him with sad eyes.
And she would nick his wallet. 

King Lizard - A Nightmare Living the Dream (UK 2012)

cute monster girl
It's not easy being green. Luckily she's green and pretty otherwise life would really suck. 
 Mother was a stripper. Dad...remains a mystery but apparently he hangs out around Loch Ness.

Here's what they sound like

Sirenia - Perils Of The Deep Blue (Norway 2013)

sexy mermaid album cover
She doesn't tend to eat many women. Not because she has any feelings of sisterhood - redheads are delicious, in fact - but because women aren't just looking at the face and the boobs.
Which is why they tend to notice important details.  Like the tail and all the skulls lying around. 

Leaves Eyes - Meredead (Norway/Germany 2011)

 Every year the villagers of the coast pay tribute to the nymphs of the sea, hoping to keep their tempestous natures pacified..
But every now and again one just decides to cause a flood for the hell of it.
When all is said and done, living in the sea don't half get tedious sometimes. 

Ashentide - S/T (2011)

So this young mermaid sacrified her silken voice and ten years from her life for a chance to walk the lands of men.
Apparently they have these things called "Shoes" which sound absolutely fascinating.

 Dragonfly - Alma Irae (Argentina 2011)

People underestimate flower fairies at their peril. They look at the wings and the tendency to go "Ooh. Look at the pretty flower" and forget that fairies are basically elves who can fly with a mean streak and an amazing ability to hold a grudge.
I don't have a story for this one. I just thought you might like to see the back cover as well. 

and finally 

Martriden - The Unsettling Dark (USA 2008)

They call her The White Lady and when the moon is at it's very brightest, she walks through the night. Legend has it that if you speak to her, if you catch her eye, even  if your foot touches her moonshadow she will come to claim you at the next full moon. So folks bolt their doors and lay blessed amulets across their windows and cower behind their curtains until the sunrise
I met her once as I lay lost and drunken in the woods. 
She walked up to me, shinging bright and beautiful, her hair flowing like a waterfall in the night air and she asked me
"Why is there no nightlife in this bloody town. Hey, can I have a bit of your kebab?"
I think of her sometimes and weep.


That's all folks.



1 comment:

  1. As usual, your commentary is highly amusing and entertaining, Big D, especially The White Lady complaining of boredom and asking for a bit of your kebab. LOL! One thing these creatures all have in common is great big boobs. Supernatural? I think not. Just unnatural.

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