Film Review: Invaders Of The Lost Gold (1982)

 

Philippines 1944. A Japanese unit transporting gold through the jungle is attacked by hostile natives and barely manage to hide the gold before being wiped out - except for three officers who vow to return for the gold one day. 

 36 years later. The remaining Japanese officer is "persuaded" to lead a motley collection of  adventurers into the jungle: A rich guy, his daughter and hired hand, a Phillipino couple, a washed up jungle-guide and an arrogant gold-hunter. With the last two in particular absolutely hating each other, it's a question of whether the jungle will kill them before they kill each other. 

 "Invaders Of The Lost Gold" is also known as "Horror Safari" and after watching this film I couldn't help feeling that either title deserves to be applied to a much more exciting movie.

 Don't even get me started on the poster. 

  "Invaders.." just doesn't manage to do anything exciting or even semi-interesting.  According to IMDB the script was being rewritten daily, which might explain why the whole thing feels so patchy.  For a film about treasure hunting in the Jungle there's a distinct absence of adventure. Even as the characters are gradually whittled down by mishap and skulduggery, it's so badly handled that any potential excitement is leached away.  How the hell do you make a crocodile attack boring?  How do you make me wait 75 minutes for a climax that would be considered dull in an Australian daytime soap opera?  

  I would also like to know why one suddenly dies mid-swim for no apparent reason. One minute fine, next minute scared, next minute dead. Did the crew forget to film the shot where somebody killed her? 

  To be fair, the cast isn't bad and this is probably the only time you will see Harold "Oddjob" Sakata and Glynis "spent her whole career playing posh, blonde Brits." Barber in the same film. But dear gods, nothing that anybody does matters.  

To sum up: Invaders Of the Lost Gold is a wasted opportunity. Don't bother.