Cheapo DVD Reviews: Vampire Apocalypse (2012)

Back cover Blurb

"Vampire Apocalypse takes the Vampire genre to a new level of intensity and violence. Danika has lost her memory. When Danika turns out to be a vampire in need of fresh blood, and sinks her fangs into Jack's ex- girlfriend Sherry (Jordan Madley), Jack is soon into something very deep and twisted. Tidying up the mess, Jack tries to find a way to satisfy his new girlfriend's needs, that doesn't involve homicide, but alas only blood from a live human will do. At work, Jack's partner Roger (Robert Fitzpatrick) notices changes in his friend, and becomes concerned when his behaviour becomes more and more erratic. With bodies rising from the dead, and corpses piling up in his apartment Jack has arrived at

The Vampire Apocalypse!"

The DVD cover isn't remotely subtle about what it's ripping off. A leather-clad brunette looking out over a rain-soaked cityscape, shiny, shiny butt front and centre.  If you didn't immediately think "Underworld" then you haven't bought a DVD in about 20 years.
   However, the notion that you might be watching a vampire action flick comes to a screeching halt about a minute into the opening credits. The jazzy, Mexican-style music and graphics really don't fit the movie the DVD cover is trying to sell you and it's glaringly obvious that a new title has been pasted in over the top of the original.

 Now here's what the movie cover looked like when it was released in 2008 

 Huh... it's almost like somebody repackaged a film with the cynical intent of  fooling the punters.  

Well it worked because I bought the bloody thing. In my defence I wanted to see whether it really was an Underworld rip-off or not. Which it isn't

 The annoying thing is, I would happily have forked out a few quid to see "Bitten" and I wouldn't have pent the first half minutes wondering when the Vampire Apocalypse was due to happen. 

As it turns out Vampire Not-Remotely Apocalypse is a quirky story about a young man finding out his new girlfriend is a vampire.  And it's not bad.   

 Jason Mewes does a good job of  playing an unlucky dude trying to deal with the strangeness, Erica Cox could easily have phoned it in and let the fan service do the job  (Seriously, she's fully dressed in only two scenes and the rest of the time she's wearing her pants.) ...but manages to make Danica complex, seamlessly evolving from distressed damsel to predator and veteran Roger Fitzpatrick has fun as Mewes's crude mentor/best buddy Roger.

 I also enjoyed the way Vampire Apocalypse Bitten gets darker as it goes on.  The humour that's there for earlier scenes drains away as hero Jack tries to rein in Danica's murderous tendencies.  What you initially think is going to be a darkly amusing Boy Meets Girl story turns into a Boy Meets Train Wreck.  

How much did I pay for this: £2.50

Was it worth it: Once I got over the initial disconnect from the film I was expecting, yes.  Bitten has it's slow moments but is overall worth seeing. 

Now can somebody please find the guy that did the DVD cover for this and give him a punch in the dick?