DVD Review: Guns, Girls, Gambling (2012)

Starring:

Christian Slater  

(In an Elvis outfit, Albeit briefly)

Gary Oldman 

(In an Elvis Outfit)

Tony Cox 

(In an Elvis Outfit)

Anthony Brandon Wong 

(In an Elvis outfit)

Chris Kattan 

(In An Elvis Outfit. It all makes sense in context)

Powers Booth 

(In a white outfit like Boss Hogg used to wear. 

If you were around in the 70s you'll know who I'm talking about)

Jeff Fahey

(In a Cowboy outfit.)

Helena Mattson

(In the outfit from the DVD cover.

This may or may not have affected my decision to buy said DVD.

 Yes I am that shallow. )

Megan Park

(Who doesn't get to dress up at all. Poor thing.)

The DVD blurb: "When a priceless Apache War Mask is stolen from an Indian casino all hell breaks loose. A random stranger, John Smith, soon finds himself caught in the middle of the mayhem when he becomes the prime suspect. With a million dollar reward on offer for the safe return of the mask, the wrongly accused Smith begins dodging bullets from corrupt cops, assassins and a drop dead beautiful blonde - all determined to hunt him down and get their hands on the prize money."    

 No mention of Elvis impersonators, you'll notice. 

Given a) how important they are to the plot and b) the scientifically proven fact that Elvis impersonators make any film 16% better, this is probably a major flaw in the marketing.

 One of the Elvis impersonators is a Dwarf.   And nobody thought to mention this on the DVD cover? 

Think of all the potential sales lost because somebody didn't do their job properly. 

Ahem.

"Guns, Girls,Gambling" opens with a knackered Gary Oldman (Dressed as Elvis, obviously.) climbing aboard a bus in the Nevada desert. Then a gorgeous young woman steps on board, quotes some Edgar Allen Poe and opens up with a brace of pistols. 

   The story does that "start in the middle then skip back" trick, there's a knowing voice-over from Slater that brings in the Pocahontas story, a couple of running gags straight out of a screwball movie and at one point a character decides to deconstruct certain racial stereotypes while smacking our hero about. 

You think maybe this film is trying just a little too hard?

  Luckily they mostly get away with it. It's not the sort of movie that makes you ring up your mates and go "You need to see this." but it is more than entertaining enough for my liking.

  The storyline has multiple gun-toting nutters chasing our hero about, but thankfully you don't need a crib-sheet to keep track of  the teams. And the ending came as a genuine surprise to me. 

 Slater & co play their parts with a nod and a wink to the essential daftness, avoiding the temptation to get too wacky. Considering they are in a film with gun-toting Elvises, that can't have been easy.

 Action sequences - nothing too flashy or gory and none of them outstay their welcome.

I was  pleasantly surprised to find that the blonde from the cover (Yes, that is how she's credited. "The Blonde" ) is in it for more than one scene. Not always the case in this sort of film. 

 We never do find out why she's so big on Edgar Allen Poe. Makes a change from lame puns, I guess.

 So, to sum up. "Guns, Girls, Gambling" is maybe a bit too knowing for it's own good but if you can get past that, and you just want something none too taxing for a Saturday night, this should do the trick.   

 You may find that your enjoyment is enhanced by eating a big Doner Kebab at the same time. 

It's that kind of movie. 

 Time for some screenshots. 

 The King waits for a bus. 

A crazy woman gets on and starts spouting poetry.

I've had this happen to me. 

Funnily enough the mad person in question didn't look like this. 

They were older, fatter and female only in the loosest sense of the word .

Smelled like goat ass too.

I love UK public transport. 

Gary is understandably confused. 

John Smith getting an unfriendly reaction from Native Americans. Nobody is surprised by this. 

"Hi. I'm your compulsory female sidekick. I'm perky"

"That's nice...No offence but I think I'd rather have had the girl in the catsuit. She's got guns"

"By guns, you mean boobs, right?"

"No. I mean guns. Like this next guy's got."

 A midget Elvis packing heat.

I'm not even going to try and follow that. 

Here's the trailer. 

That's all folks.