Saturday, 6 October 2018

Cheapo DVD Review: Hired to Kill (1990)

Reviewing DVDs from CEX and Charity Shops.

Genre: Man In A Vest Action Movie. 

  A flint-hearted  mercenary is hired to rescue a political prisoner currently held in a small, vaguely-Mediterranean  country in the hopes that this will kickstart a revoloution against the ruling  junta. 
  His cover: a fashion designer premiering the latest collection.  Recruiting a motley collection of  tough - but photogenic - young women from around Europe, Frank Ryan must mould them into an effective team and complete a dangerous mission while at the same time getting some really good photoshoots in. 

  This is one of those action movies that relies on the bad guys being monumentally incompetent.  The climactic rescue would have come to a bloody end in about 5 minutes if the local bullyboys understood anything about mounting a proper defence perimeter. Or staying awake. 
 They really are bloody useless.

There's a couple of other niggles.

Niggle the first being "hero" Frank Ryan. he's almost impossible to like as he remains cynical, cold-hearted and massively overdosed on Alpha-male machismo throughout the entire picture.  Really, he's like a bitter 14 year old's idea of what a "proper" man ought to be. That makes it even more jarring when an argument with one of his female team suddenly leads to a sex scene. There's absolutely nothing up to that point to explain why these two have any feelings towards each other and my first reaction was that I was about to see the supposed hero rape somebody. 

Earlier in the film Frank snogs bad guy Colonel Bartos (Oliver Reed topping up his whiskey fund.) and that comes across as more passionate and more realistic. 
It makes sense in context and believe me, it's not even the most awkward scene in the film.  

 You also have to wonder why the CIA didn't just send in an all-female team anyway.  Or why they couldn't find half a dozen glamorous killers on their own payroll and use them.
  Sticking with Ryans Angels, they only get a brief sketching in of personality. There's the mute one, the one who had to be blackmailed into going along, the one that has history with Ryan, the bitchy lesbian, the English one, the....other one.  I think it says a lot that they spend more time modelling nice clothes than actually training.  

Having said all that, the end result is a flawed-but-watchable 90s action movie. I found myself getting into it and the big rescue scene is surprisingly tense, and entertaining even if it's a little ridiculous. 

To sum up: Don't expect too much and you might enjoy Hired To Kill. 

How much did I pay for this: 50p
Was it worth it: Taking into account the aforementioned niggles, I was pleasantly surprised. 


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